"Kelly Clarkson, the singer who rose to fame after winning the inaugural season of the very popular show American Idol has given a befitting response to someone who called her fat."
"What brought that on?"
"Well, I just wanted to point out the differences between the two First Daughters - Ivanka and Maryam."
"Oh, for Pete's sake, Ivanka is a former model, knows what would look good on her and has a company that produces high-end clothes, while Maryam has no such experience, she is like Prince Charles: she is being trained for one job and one job alone which is to inherit her dad's position in the party which incidentally requires him to exit the scene...and before you say anything that you may regret let me remind you that Ivanka is not a Kashmiri which Maryam is and Kashmiris' love for rice presents a challenge to their figures and..."
"Isn't Mirwaiz, the Hurriyet Conference leader, kind of very thin? As is Yasim Malik..."
"You crazy fellow, those two are routinely subjected to Indian atrocities, which doesn't bode well for access to food. However I concede that Maryam Nawaz was looking extremely fit a year or so ago but what with mounting challenges to the party and all..."
"OK, let's move on...I heard analysts stating that she has emerged as her father's heir after her interview with the Joint Investigation Team and do you agree with that?"
"What you are really asking me is whether First Uncle or shall we say the Only Uncle has agreed to being bypassed in the inheritance roster?"
"Yes."
"If you recall, I mentioned that when Shahbaz Sharif came out of the interview with JIT he spoke for a while, but the report of his speech was not disseminated by the Press Information Department."
"I remember and the PID stated that it only undertakes publicity of the cabinet members."
"Correct, and let me inform you that Maryam Nawaz's post-JIT interview speech was also not disseminated by the PID though she had the Minister in charge with her...."
"What do you reckon? It was in deference to First Uncle's sensibilities?"
"I think so and mind you, Maryam Nawaz was not accompanied by any member of the First Uncle's family like her dad was however unlike the First Uncle there were more than 7 or 8 press briefings by cabinet members and general factotums like Kirmani during her two hour interrogation and when she came out she didn't take questions and..."
"Yes, so the inheritance is not quite in the bag besides I would request you to recall the hype when Bilawal was first launched - the jiyalas got excited that the Zardis would be suppressed and did that happen?"
"No, it didn't..."
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