A group of harassed husbands are to meet in the northern Indian hill town of Shimla Saturday to protest against domestic violence against men and the misuse of laws intended to protect women.
Men who are beaten up by their wives and have no avenue for redress or complaint, extortion of money through false dowry cases, cruelty to parents-in-law by wives, using child custody as a tool to demoralise men - these are just some of the issues that will be discussed at the national convention organised by the Save Indian Family Foundation (SIFF).
"We have organised the national convention on August 15, India's Independence Day, because we want to use the occasion to speak out about how more and more men in this country are losing their freedom and are victims," SIFFmember Virag Dhulia said.
"About 100 leaders representing organisations working for men's rights will be attending the three-day convention in Shimla. They represent about 30,000 members," Dhulia added. SIFF runs 100 helplines across the country to help men in distress. "You would be surprised at the number of calls we get - they average 300 to 350 a week and come from all across the country," Dhulia said.
Dhulia, who works at an information technology firm in the southern city of Bangalore, desperately searched for help when he found himself facing dowry and maintenance demands, which he claims were false. "The SIFF helplines, the weekly meetings it organises where men in similar circumstances can interact, helped me understand that mine was not a one-off problem, that the phenomenon is widespread," he said.
Wasis Ali, an early member of SIFF, said, "We try to provide moral support in those initial terrible months to make sure a person's health or career does not crumble." Dowry is a rampant problem in Indian society and is often used to exploit and harass the bride and her family.
Under Indian law, a dowry is defined as a gift demanded or given as a precondition for marriage. Giving or receiving any dowry of more than 7,000 rupees (about 150 dollars) is a crime and can be punished by imprisonment of up to six months.
In efforts to contain rising dowry-related violence and deaths, a new section was introduced to India's Penal Code in 1983 which says that a husband or relative of a husband who is found to subject the wife to cruelty would be punished by imprisonment of up to three years and a hefty fine. Various surveys, like a recent one by eastern state Orissa's Women Commission, have found that dowry-related laws and the Domestic Violence Act were being increasingly used by women to harass their husbands.
"These laws are needed, given the centuries-old history of exploitation of women, but unfortunately the law has been framed in a manner which leaves many loopholes that are exploited by unscrupulous women and their families," Kolkata-based lawyer Sadhana Sarkar said.
The police can immediately arrest the husband and in-laws when a women complains. Chief Justice of India KG Balakrishnan said in Delhi in February that in some cases the matrimonial cruelty provisions were "grossly misused." However, Girija Vyas, chairwoman of the National Commission for Women, said: "I would not like to use the term misuse. There is lack of awareness amongst people that is exploited by lawyers and police. We feel there is no need to review the law."
Both Dhulia and Ali claim the main aim of Saturday's convention is to bring together people who are in the same boat to give them a sense of strength. "Men usually don't share deeply personal stuff and that makes it more difficult if your wife starts harassing you," Ali said. "In this group, someone just has to say: 'she's creating trouble with my parents' or 'she hits me because she thinks I don't earn enough' and everyone understands."
Dhulia claims that society sees a man who complains of being harassed by his wife as weak. "There is nowhere to go for redress. One complaint and you and your family are in jail and face social stigma. Then there are drawn-out cases and money going down the drain accompanied by all the trauma." The harassed husband's convention, its organisers hope, will catch the attention of society and government and initiate a streamlining of the laws to prevent their misuse.