"I am not a lawyer..."

"Dear, dear me."

"What? I am not lying, I am not a lawyer - by education or training..."

"Training?"

"In our part of the world influence or in cases where the individual has considerable steam of his own; jobs - lucrative jobs - fall into their lap..."

"So are you in the running for the job of attorney general or Law Minister or..."

"No just Interior Minister - a portfolio held by a man who has never performed in any portfolio, is a generalist and not an expert and...."

"What rubbish! He is an expert in verbal attacks and...and...he has displayed a finely honed capacity to evade capture by poor police - recall the time when he escaped on a scooter with a cigar and...."

"And most importantly in these trying times when each rupee, dwindling rupee that I earn is buying less and less on the market he provides comic relief and that is very important. I mean which other 50 plus cabinet can make us smile....Ghulam Sarwar with his explanations for destroying PIA and..."

"That's true anyway what were you going to say when you said you are not a lawyer?"

"Oh right.... Anyway I aint a lawyer but...."

"Saying ain't instead of am not is hardly any change...."

"Change my friend has to start somewhere and..."

"You are being facetious today aren't you? I noted one change though - with the nexus between the Former First Daughter and The Maulana getting stronger by the day has given relevance to the Former Much retired Captain Safdar - a relevance that the PML-N has yet to...."

"The Maulana has always been more comfortable with me than with women...."

"Except his wife or is it wives...."

"Don't be silly anyway I am not a lawyer but as I understand law most cases are won because one of the contractual parties did not follow the process clearly identified in the contract and National Accountability Bureau did not follow the process...."

"Oh so the judgment in favour of Broadsheet isn't about Nawaz Sharif's assets as per the government nor is it quite about misspending by the Musharraf regime but about NAB's failure to follow the process agreed...."

"I would still hope that the millions paid from the tax payers account is reimbursed by Musharraf and the NAB minions at the time, not the present minions, for greater transparency and accountability and..."

"If wishes were horses..."

"I see pigs flying in...."

"Shush...."

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