“Yet another victory, I say!”

“You need to narrow it down – I mean Abdul Public is bombarded each day by claims of victory by all and sundry – the PPP, the PML-N, the factions within PML-N, the government, the…”

“Abdul Public?”

“You don’t expect me to say Q Public as they do in the US - I mean they chose the letter Q because I guess there aren’t too many first or second names that start with Q but we in the Islamic Republic have the Qureshis and the Qasims and the…”

“Don’t forget Qandeel and then there is Qadir whose love for…”

“Let him be, he remains under house arrest by his own family, I am not sure if he has been released…”

“Hmmm, Quinton is an Anglo Saxon name but not sure how popular it is.”

“Anyway so can you narrow it down please - I mean The Khan whose daily exposure to the Abdul Public has assumed a historical high and during each exposure he begins his speech by extending khiraj-e-tehseen which translated means heartfelt sincere congratulations to more than one Khan Selected…”

“Ha ha, yes but to narrow it down it is someone who has not received khiraj-e-tehseen from The Khan recently though his portfolio has not changed during three years…”

“Shahzad Akbar? I don’t think so, it is common knowledge that The Khan cannot stand weight gain and the guy’s girth continues to expand making his shirt look like a tight fitting t-shirt and…”

“Really? You reckon that’s why The Khan is mad at him and not because three years down the line he has not brought any money back and the penalty money Malik Riaz paid in the UK that was remitted to Pakistan that Akbar allowed to be adjusted against what Malik owed in Pakistan and…”

“No, though I extend khiraj-e-tehseen to you for sidetracking the issue.”

“Sheikh Rashid? But he has delivered in Fawad Chaudhary’s portfolio not his own and need I add most of the Khanzadehs are delivering in Fawad Chaudhary’s portfolio…”

“Ha, ha, but not this guy.”

“I give up.”

“The Law Minister.”

“But which case has he won, I mean…”

“He has won the important ones silly – Musharraf remains safe in Dubai, he won the Qazi Faez Isa reference because Serena Isa had to engage with the FBR, then there was…”

“A complete reversal as per the final review verdict…”

“Legal matters are about interpretation and if you have any issues with his claims then allow him to interpret…”

“But the decisions…”

“Hey don’t play Babar Awan who is trying to get his job and…”

“I give up…”

“And what do you say?”

“I extend khiraj-e-tehseen to Farogh Naseem unreservedly.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2021