“Uh oh.” “The Supreme Court verdict…” “See the glass as half full – if this 85 plus cabinet goes then so does Dar otherwise no chance.”

“I can’t understand which part of Dar’s claims disputed by government data has convinced not one, not two, not ten, but all 85 cabinet members.”

“The mighty Nawaz Sharif…”

“Ha, ha, ha, mighty and yet not delusional about the ability of the party to win elections!”

“Ah but he reckons Dar has no role, it’s the godfather…”

“Hush, anyway I used to think Trump and The Khan have a lot in common…”

“It isn’t the orange hair?”

“Don’t be facetious in any case on scale of one to ten in terms of looks Trump gets a 3 while The Khan gets a seven in my book.”

“Have you downgraded The Khan because of age?”

“Age catches up with us all and as Notification Maryam Nawaz (NMN) says one must always take care of one’s physical appearance to reach the optimum possible even if the possible includes the use of a frying pan…”

“Hmm, and need I add with the advances in cosmetic surgery the possible is without limits with the only limit being money….”

“Declared or not!”

“See that reminds me, I can’t understand why a female heir who is enjoying the proceeds of corruption is exempt from prosecution in our country. I reckon repayment of the entire corrupt proceeds plus accruing interest to the state...”

“This is in reference to NMN or The Third Wife?”

“Both and may I request the Chief Justice to take up the matter of the return of all Toshakhana gifts – no exceptions because frankly we do not have a Modi in our midst…”

“A fascist?”

“Those we have, I meant someone who auctions his gifts and then donates the proceeds to his favourite charity.”

“Hmmm, anyway that’s not what has upset me today. I am deeply concerned with the Monetary Policy Statement (MPS) it creeps me out.”

“Because the raise of one percent to 21 percent may not be enough to ease IMF concerns?”

“There I agree but that’s not the issue for me as a householder, what is an issue is that the MPS has again emphasized the need for fiscal consolidation.”

“That’s what we need my friend.”

“Yes but Dar and company will simply raise indirect taxes so all my purchases will become more expensive and inflation will rise and this one percent raise in discount rate will have no impact on reducing inflation.”

“That’s the irony – the SBP suggestion will achieve the exact opposite.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2023