“He is The Great Balancer.” “Well that’s a new one – I mean Zardari sahib is known as the Great Negotiator and that too within the highly polarized and increasingly checkered map of this hapless country…”
“Does that mean not with foreign governments?”
“Well on offer is the chair of a committee, a ministry, money, assistance in relocation at a destination out of Pakistan…”
“Right but where the terms require troops or government to government…”
“Yes not that good there. Anyway the Great Balancer could not be Nawaz Sharif – the guy has achieved a maximum of a little less than four years in office…”
“Hey look at it this way – the last time he was prime minister his period in office was the longest – nearly four years and perhaps the fourth time…”
“But not a balancer!”
“OK not, but then who is the Great Balancer – The Maulana? I mean he has very limited ambitions – the chair of the Kashmir Committee - I mean his ambitions are less than those of the next generation of the Sharif s and the Bhutto Zardaris and…”
“No its Shehbaz Sharif. The guy successfully led an eleven party coalition government with partners that included Zardari sahib and The Maulana and his Brother and Niece…”
“Got it. And agree – I mean Notification Maryam Nawaz (NMN) is silent and the only one who can ensure that is daddy and so Shahbaz Sharif convinced daddy to keep her quiet, then daddy is quiet too and this is in spite of no legal remedy to his being arrested upon arrival…”
“But Shehbaz Sharif says that if the PML-N is in a position to form the next government then Big Brother will become the prime minister and so Big Brother is happy.”
“I thought the establishment wants Shehbaz Sharif…”
“Right and if you know it so do the brothers Sharif. So let us wait and see who wins?”
“Pretty much those who always win. But didn’t Shehbaz Sharif say there will be no Sheen (Urdu alphabet) as in the first letter of Shehbaz from Noon (the Urdu alphabet from which his brother’s name starts)?”
“Did he ever say there will be no Sheen from Meem as in NMN!”
“No, but hey I know who will be the ideal caretaker Prime Minister by the way.”
“Who?”
“Captain retired Safdar – no one is talking to him, not his in-laws, not members of his father-in-law’s party, not the Bhutto Zardaris, not the establishment, not the judiciary, not…”
“So why would he be ideal?”
“With no one talking to him elections would go in the direction of the wind.”
“Wouldn’t that be the case whoever was appointed the caretaker PM!”
“Duh yeah! But this way would be more interesting wouldn’t it!”
Copyright Business Recorder, 2023