What’s the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?” “In Pakistan a good lawyer is one who takes on a case for the Deliverers rather than those Delivered.”

“That’s a tad cryptic for me to understand.”

“Well the Deliverers are the ones who can ensure, how shall I put it, implementation of the policy of redressal as per the Nawalas, as opposed to the policy of elitism in our legal system as per those who are no longer on the same page…”

“Reminds me of the Law Minister appointed by The Man Who Must Remain Nameless.”

“Indeed, unlike The Man Who Must Remain Nameless he is not in jail, his party - the MQM - has forged an alliance with the Nawalas so the prospect of a federal ministry has resurfaced and…”

“Hmmm, how would Zardari sahib define a good lawyer?”

“Zardari sahib inherited lawyers who don’t charge the party leaders and they are rewarded when the party is in power.”

“I hear Zardari sahib is not happy because his tactical moves to lure the electables in southern Punjab and Balochistan were checkmated so no power in the Centre is Plan A, these days.”

“Right but Sindh is going nowhere and the Sindh government also hires lawyers.”

“That’s true anyway when I asked you the difference between a good and a bad lawyer…”

“Wait I have the answer. A good lawyer, like the electables…”

“Hush be careful; don’t forget any member of the lawyer community could take you to court for defamation…”

“Hey I haven’t taken any names besides our defamation laws may be good but implementation…”

“Shush I say - anyway the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer is that a bad lawyer can let a case drag out for several years while a good lawyer can make it last even longer.”

“I have one for you: a lawyer’s son decided to follow in his father’s footsteps and graduated with honours. He then joined his dad’s law firm and at the end of the first day rushed into his father’s office and said, father, in one day I broke the Smith case that you’ve been working on for so long, and his father yelled you idiot, we have been living on the funding of that case for ten years!”

“There you go, that shows that an honour’s degree beats experience every time.”

“No one in Pakistani politics has an honour’s degree right?”

“I think at least one lawyer does – from Montecito?”

“Careful my friend.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2023