“What do you think of the performance of the Samdhi in Search of Portfolios (SSP)?” “Brings to mind a rather junior position in police.”

“SSP stands for special superintendent police, and as we all know, the key word is special.”

“True, he remains special even though he submitted an affidavit against Nawaz Sharif, cost the economy 4 billion dollars in lost remittance inflows in just nine months of getting the portfolio of finance…”

“I think the revolving door has been nailed shut as far as he is concerned.”

“Revolving door?”

“Our finance ministers have been using a revolving door – they are pushed out and in spite of poor performance come right back in – though SSP is the only one who has used the door when the PML-N is in power. The others do not bother to discriminate between political parties.”

“What about Shamshad Akhtar? She used the door twice already as a caretaker.”

“Yes, but I don’t reckon she will be using that door ever again because of the wheat crisis in Punjab, apparently she was summoned by the inquiry team and did not show up.”

“I have it on good authority that she had a prior engagement!”

“The word prior reminds me of prior donor conditions – you know, conditions that require sacrifices from the general public not the stakeholders.”

“Right anyway, how do you think SSP is performing these days?”

“You have to narrow it down. He is chair of many economic related committees, he is foreign minister, he is deputy prime minister, he is…”

“I was referring to his portfolio of foreign minister!”

“Great coverage – he was welcomed by the Petroleum Minister of the Gambia as he arrived to attend the OIC moot, he met with Gambia’s president…”

“You being facetious?”

“I reckon his performance is better than Blinken’s!”

“Blinken has failed to broker a deal between Israel and Hamas which is necessary before the US elections, instead he went on record to say that the Israelis made a very generous offer to Hamas though the deal on offer by the Israelis was not a permanent ceasefire and this in spite of the destruction of Gaza with US precision weapons…”

“But Blinken said it was a generous offer, and Blinken is an honourable man.”

“Speaking of Shakespeare, Poodle Cameron also said the offer was generous.”

“Moving forward how many more Ukrainians must die, already a 100,000 have died, for the US to seek some deal that would stop the bloodshed!”

“Blinken has a solution: threaten China to stop arm supplies to Russia while the US continues to supply arms to Ukraine…”

“Did he succeed?”

“No, but he is getting great coverage on the Western media.”

“As much as SSP?”

“SSP gets coverage only locally, Blinken is an international figure.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2024