“So what do you mean by surgery?” “That’s rather a silly question. Surgery is when you have an operation and some surgeries are how can I put it more equal than others – I mean there is major surgery and minor surgery and…”

“I reckon whether it is minor or major depends on the person who is going to undergo surgery. If I am the patient then a surgery would be a major one for me – it could be an appendicitis, it could open-heart surgery if I am the one under the knife it’s going to be major for me.”

“I fully agree with you.”

“Right but when I asked you to define surgery it was an indirect way for me to ask what was your profession?”

“How could that…”

“See if you ask a surgeon he or she will define surgery as an operation. If you ask the patient who is to undergo surgery, he or she will have the same definition.”

“And your point is?”

“What if you ask a Cabinet member today?”

“Where in Pakistan? Or in France where snap elections have been called with the President gambling on the French voting for his party and against the Far Right led by Marine Le Pen which trounced him recently in the European elections.”

“I guess the French President has forgotten how unpopular he is – I mean the organized resistance to his pension reforms that he ignored, the resistance by the trade union s and…”

“He is banking on the people being educated enough not to vote for a party that is Far Far Right…”

“I would add another far there. Anyway no I wasn’t referring to France I was referring to the multiple hatted Brown Pope who has said that the cricket team needs surgery.”

“Which hat was he wearing when he said that?”

“Ostensibly the Chairman of the Pakistan Cricket Board hat, but you know my point is….is…well remember when we were told by the West to roll back our nuclear programme, and we used to say how can you roll back knowledge that you possess.”

“Yeah?”

“So the multiple hatted man is a former caretaker chief minister, a current interior minister and a current PCB Chairman, current owner of a media outlet and…”

“A current son-in-law, a current….”

“OK but the Brown Pope’s definition of surgery is firing people right, and…why the solemn face?”

“I thought surgery meant he will resign and…”

“We are a nation of doctors as far as defining surgery is concerned. Surgery is always, but always, performed on the other person.”

“I stand corrected.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2024