Poet, short-story writer, journalist, artist and columnist Abeda Iqbal Azad passed away on April 20, 2012. Abeda was born in Dhaka, Bangladesh. She was a graduate of medicine but toggled between multi lines of interest. She also translated many short stories written by Khalil Gibran, Krishan Chander, and Nobel laureate Rabindranath Tagore into Urdu. She also translated many famous poems of Tagore. April 20, 2013 mark her first death anniversary.
The following is one of her articles:
"Do people like me "is a question that haunts every mind irrespective of age and gender. It is an inborn human desire to be well-liked by the people and stay in the fame game. However, it is also quite a task to rule the list of popularity in your social or friends' circle. Equally, it is difficult to maintain your social rapport without being liked by the people around. There are certain points the observation of which leads a person to popularity.
-- Let the people think that you like them. It will make them to reciprocate with a similar approach towards you.
-- Let them believe that they can trust you when they are in need. Do reserve their confidentiality if they come up with something personal.
-- Do not mess up after committing a mistake aware or unaware. Confess to your mistakes cheerfully.
-- Never refuse to accept a gift or a souvenir from someone either from your family members or from your friends but appreciate it heartily, never mind if you had hoped for a better one. Exchange of presentations helps strengthen the bond of friendship.
-- Do not bear any grudge against anybody. Even if you have a feeling of resentment towards anyone, do not nurture, neither ignore. Just try to overpower it with a pleasant reaction before it could destroy your relationship.
-- Do not show any prejudice while forming your friend's circle. The best friend-circle is one which consists of friends from all community and of different tastes and ideas and even from different countries.
-- When you are attending a party or if someone is visiting you, behave in a manner as if you are having a very good time with the visitor. Do something out of the ordinary to let the visitor feel that he/she is being welcomed with all your heart.
-- Never interrupt while one is conversing with you and by no means try to change the topic while someone is talking about his children, wife or a wife about her husband, even if you are getting bored of the subject matter.
-- If you are a lady invited over a meal, be generous to appreciate the culinary skills of the hostess. Show your liking for the food menu prepared by her, no matter if it is your mother, a sister or mom in law. It will be a simple but hearty commendation paid to the hospitality and efforts she has undertaken just to entertain you.
-- Appreciate the minute change in the hairstyle or the dress of your friend; it shows your full attention to the person and he/she feels you closer, concern and involved.
-- Never forget the birthdays and anniversaries of parents, sisters, brothers and fast friends. Even a plain greeting on the occasion will make the feel your care and concern for them.
-- Be interested in things that are liked by your parents, husband, wife, sisters, brothers and close friends. It will deliver your sense of harmony and a strong bonding towards them.
-- Listen politely to a thing even if it is of no importance to you. If you cannot agree over any issue, try to convince the other person with valid reasons. Never be loud nor lose your temper during an argument and do not attempt to push your own ideas on others.
-- Accept apologies with a smile and let the person understand that things have been settled without being harsh in your manners. .
-- Never refuse to suggest any correct or suitable thing when your advice is sought; it pays nothing but gains you the faith of the person seeking a counselling from you.
-- Be honest to your friends and social contacts. Never be a deceiver. The more you act sincerely, the more they will turn to you.
-- Do not let your personality stained by unhealthy gossips and never talk ill of anybody.
-- Do not break the date of any engagement or happening once you have fixed, even if someone whom you like better asks you for it.
-- Be proud of your parents; introduce your friends to them with your head high no matter if they belong to low social or financial status.
-- Girls and ladies should avoid the use of such languages as may hurt the feelings of the guests.
-- While in a social gathering, specially in a mixed company as a guest, girls should also avoid loud and boisterous languages and jokes.
-- Select your wardrobe that suits you and is appropriate for the society and culture. It should be trendy and current also. You can steal the limelight by choosing dresses and colors according to the weather and occasion. One can easily find herself in the centre of attraction by selecting sober line of outfits and by avoiding wearing dresses that expose you above the limits.
-- Do not wear extra coats of makeup. It should be used only to hide the flaws, to add enhancements to the face or to give the face a pleasant lift. Overdoing will hide the normalcy of your face and will bury its natural look under the mask of deep cosmetic layers.
-- Above all, you should always be in style, trendy and contemporary. Take interest in all social and public matters. Read a lot. It will give you an ability to be in the middle of discussions. If you stay current and updated then at least you will not be shying away from people waiting for your opinion.