Partly Facetious: Those living in Middlesex

03 Oct, 2017

"So what makes a good lawyer?"
"One who can argue well and the bottom-line is he/she wins cases."
"Don't use that term?"
"What term? I don't get you."
"He/she term."
"That's not a term - we have men and women lawyers and..."
"Parveen Rashid is already on record as having smiled rather sheepishly when referring to Middlesex county (UK), I guess for him Middlesex means an individual born with male and female parts..."
"First of all, it's Parvez and not Parveen...so either get your keyboard sorted out or stop referring to him altogether. And secondly, I don't think he was implying that all those living in Middlesex have male and female parts..."
"He said if a Muslim mentions Middlesex he has to do a wazoo (ablution)? So if a Muslim lives in Middlesex he doesn't stop the ablutions?"
"Don't be facetious.... anyway I asked you what makes a good lawyer in the Land of the Pure?"
"Well, here we have partisan lawyers and independents."
"In other countries we have lawyers who support one political party over another as well."
"But do they support Nawaz Sharif as the nawalas do and Zardari sahib as the Zardis do?"
"I don't get you."
"With fawn-like attitude..."
"Perhaps not, but our independent lawyers I guess are like the lawyers abroad, they don't fawn on anybody..."
"Our independent lawyers are those who slap the lower judiciary, who beat up the police if one of theirs is arrested for a crime with ample evidence, quite independent of the country's laws and regulations..."
"Evidence is not relevant in the Land of the Pure! Mian sahib's lawyers' won cases because they faced a benign judiciary - till the Panama papers brought those chickens out to roost, Zardari sahib has good lawyers but faces a judiciary that isn't benign and the Khan has evidence on his side but employs lawyers who simply complicate matters."
"The good, the bad, and the ugly hunh!"
"Good movie that!"

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