Partly Facetious: The Current First Spouse

31 Aug, 2018

"No assets abroad as of today, I liked that defence."
"Didn't quite work, the apex court has requested asset details of Former First Spouse (FFS), Former President, current Indisputable Decision Maker of the Pakistan People's Party and..."
"Former First Spouse?"
"FFS is a very important and need I add influential position in the sub-continent and no one has been able to challenge that position. In Pakistan Kulsoom Nawaz as the FFS successfully negotiated on behalf of the entire Sharif clan and took them to exile in Saudi Arabia, remember it was Kulsoom Nawaz as the FFS and not Mrs Shahbaz Sharif who negotiated on behalf of the Sharif clan..."
"Perhaps, in Shahbaz Sharif's case the issue was always, will the real Mrs Shahbaz Sharif stand up and take charge... I mean there have been a number and..."
"The First Mrs Shahbaz Sharif has never been divorced and that's the one I meant but I see what you mean. Look what happened in India, Mrs Sonia Gandhi took over the Congress party..."
"Be fair, the FFS as the inheritor after a former or an incumbent prime minister expires has to have some capacity as well. Zardari sahib has that capacity. I mean if God forbid, something happens to Maryam Nawaz do you think that Captain (very much retired) Safdar would be the heir... I reckon even if he tries to access the considerable wealth in his wife's name in Pakistan with Islamic laws in place he is unlikely to get his hands on the entire estate if you know what I mean, quite unlike......"
"In terms of the Captain inheriting his wife's political legacy, remember Maryam Nawaz's political legacy is not yet confirmed in any case... and Shahbaz Sharif is in the same position as before, one too many wives..."
"Don't be facetious; you know Shahbaz Sharif's heirs are his sons."
"OK, so what about the Current First Spouse (CFS). She has many children from a former marriage and yes I know technically they are not members of the First Family but recent events show that the reality is somewhat different."
"They are a provincial subject so there!"
"Don't be facetious."
"I have already told my mother-in-law not to bug me, she lives in Lahore, so she is a provincial subject."
"Ha ha ha."

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