"So has The Buzz turned into a Wasim Akram yet?"
"After Thursday, I would have to say no. But if you had asked whether he now acts like a chief minister I would have to say yes."
"A generic chief minister or like Shahbaz Sharif in particular?"
"Has to be generic, I mean The Buzz should be held responsible for all the dengue deaths in Punjab this year, Shahbaz Sharif had put a system in place which had taken care of dengue which this man did not use and need I add he is still not using that system. I know of one dengue patient who registered in hospital and still no dengue busters came to his house like they used to during the previous administration...."
"It's those dratted Sindhi dengue mosquitoes that are trying to take over Punjab but I would have you know that they are fighting a losing battle because Larkana has fallen to the Tabdeeliites" (the change party) and those mosquitoes will be......"
"Don't be facetious, anyway what did you mean when you said The Buzz is acting like a generic chief minister?"
"During the royal visit, Governor Punjab and The Buzz seated themselves on the main sofa, and need I add in our political circles if you sit on the side you are nobody."
"But how would commoners like you and me, know which is The Chair or The Sofa in this case?"
"The one that provides the best frontal view to the cameras."
"I would have thought the cameras were not interested in the two Punjabis and..."
"Hey, Pakistan Television God bless the Ashiq lady..."
"Shush, anyway I had expected better from the Governor."
"Look at the glass as half full, he has immersed himself in our political traditions."
"Right, anyway these two gentlemen on the main sofa seated Prince William to their right, but of course, and next to Prince William they had some attendant...and on their left side they seated Kate Middleton..."
"Couldn't these two jokers have opted to seat the royal couple the way The Khan seated them, next to each other."
"But The Khan sat on no sofa, but on a chair, and need I remind you, the way the two Khanzadehs sat reflected the political intricacies in Punjab."
"Good point, but when I said The Buzz has not turned into Wasim Akram I was referring to his inability to talk to women, remember his behaviour during the Sikh lady during the Kartarpur celebrations and now again..."
"The Buzz opened the full power of his dazzling smile on the Duchess when she descended from the plane..."
"I noted his trick-eye turned towards her though the other one was looking at his feet and I am not sure whether the two have equal powers if you know what I mean."
"Hey, as The Khan says thirteen months is not enough for change and the change between being The Buzz and turning into a Wasim Akram is at least a 100 kilometers long and ..."
"And he has covered a mile so far cause he now seats himself on The Sofa."
"There you go!"
Copyright Business Recorder, 2019