PARTLY FACETIOUS: IK grappling with multiple problems

“The Khan didn’t look like The Khan on his way to get his pre-arrest bail…”

“He is grappling with multiple problems as you know and…”

“But why is he opening multiple fronts! I mean one front at a time, deal with it and….”

“One reporter asked him if he knew his wife had taken some jewellery…”

“The Khan didn’t answer but he sure looked angry as hell.”

“Ignoring someone is better than responding angrily. But to understand The Khan if all else fails go back to cricket to find answers.”

“In cricket there is one objective: to win, and there is one front, the opposing team.”

“No silly to win in cricket there are many fronts, start with the Cricket Board, then onto the selectors, then the coach, your fielders and bowlers - spin and fast and what not…”

“What not?”

“Well that is a very important ingredient in cricket and politics. The what nots. In cricket if you recall one year an influential wanted his wife to go officially on a tour…”

“Officially?”

“Paid for by the state and he thought hard and the answer was revealed to him in a dream: his wife was a doctor and she could go as the team doctor.”

“Well that was sensible.”

“Indeed, but his wife was a gynecologist and…”

“Don’t be facetious.”

“No seriously and he no doubt argued that apart from a few structural differences men and women are the same. I mean she wasn’t a vet if you know what I mean so what not in politics means the carefully selected and that means an entire army of those who surround The Khan – Gill the Fish who is unable to perform his duty these days, Awan the Babar of Montecito University, the…”

“See The Khan has so much in common with Maryam Nawaz — Parvez Rashid, Talal Chaudhary, Miftah Ismail…”

“Ah but The Khan can win elections when he campaigns, she has yet to show any result.”

“Give her time – she can at least attract crowds though perhaps not yet as large as The Khan.”

“Indeed, but anyway when I said The Khan doesn’t look like The Khan these days I meant it literally – I mean his hair was plastered on his head unattractively.”

“Dear Lord.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2022