PARTLY FACETIOUS: The Samdhi has won the heart and mind of Nawaz for all times to come

“Conferring cabinet portfolios must be viewed as overwhelming life-long largesse by the party chief and in return the appointee must exhibit undying loyalty, blind loyalty and…”

“Got it, we have an expression in Urdu which extols the virtue of life-long and blind loyalty to one’s benefactor – namakhalali…”

“Namak is salt and you know I have blood pressure and my doctor has explicitly told me not to eat salt.”

“You are never ever going to get a cabinet position my friend.”

“I can offer my services as a match-maker…”

“Stop right there. The Samdhi won the heart and mind of Nawaz Sharif for all times to come and he will always get his preferred portfolio which has been Finance…”

“Irrespective of the damage he has done to the economy?”

“Irrelevant minor detail for that is in the nature of Nawaz Sharif – he has Plan A that has never ever changed or been adjusted.”

“But adjustments are necessary in some cases. I mean…”

“How many times has Nawaz Sharif lost his job?”

“As many times as he has occupied the Prime Minister’s position.”

“There you go, that shows that his Plan A has never varied.”

“But sometimes Plan A requires befriending those who……”

“Right and sometimes those negotiations are more challenging than…than the ones with the International Monetary Fund but that doesn’t mean Plan A changes”.

“OK anyway I heard The Samdhi say in an interview that Miftah Ismail should be grateful because he was appointed as the Chair of Board of Investment…”

“But his ambition was to become a finance minister, not an interim but…”

“Got it, but I would simply say: Know what you cannot do with an economics degree but what you can with an accountancy certificate - Ismail has an economics degree and The Samdhi an accountancy certificate because you don’t go to university to get it you simply get articled to a two man…”

“Don’t be facetious. Marcus Aurelius said that a man’s worth is no greater than his ambitions, and Ismail’s ambition was to become the finance minister…”

“But The Samdhi’s ambition has been constant – to be the finance minister so who has greater humility – a man who strives for a more powerful portfolio which, because of his position in the party, he cannot fully do justice to what he learned at University…remember the tweet ji (yes) to Notification Maryam Nawaz’s directive not to tax the traders which violated the terms of agreement with the IMF.”

“I ask you who would you prefer: Ismail or a man with no background of economics but able to convince the party supremo that he is real good at his job?”

“Neither if you ask me.”

“Hey you ain’t being asked.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2023