Partly Facetious: who is going to catch Osama?

"So is Osama going to be captured by our Jawans or the Bush-Poodle forces?"
"Don't know and don't care - am getting tired of this..I mean sometimes he is in Tora Bora, then he miraculously disappears from the avenging forces - defined as those with the moral high ground, and need I add this high ground is not a reflection of the terrain - and then somehow reappears in various Pakistani towns, including Waziristan known for shall we say a foreign policy which is running quite distinct from President Musharraf's."
"Everyone has their own favoured foreign policy in Pakistan these days. We have the Maulanas with a distinct policy too."
"Yes but the President seems to be following the same policy essentially as Mian Sahib and BB - follow the Americans if they allow you to follow them and then hope for the best."
"What is the best?"
"That the aid money continues to flow in, that the military assistance continues as well and most important of all that the one in power remains in power - and I mean complete power. That is what all three had in common - Musharraf, Mian Sahib, and BB."
"What?"
"Their desire to have complete control."
"But two were PMs and one a President."
"Yes but the two PMs tried to hijack the constitution that was already hijacked by Ziaul Haq just as effectively as Musharraf tried to hijack the Mian Sahib amended constitution."
"Yeah. I mean I think we should now just ignore the constitution and see what each one wants."
"I guess."
"So who is going to catch Osama finally?"
"Has to be the US forces, I mean Bush would cut off all aid and put us on the black list if any Jawan or a soldier from Poodleland caught Osama..did you remember how they left the Poodle soldiers behind in the south of Iraq as the Americans speeded to Baghdad to all the pomp and glory..?"
"The glory turned to gore.."
"But wasn't the coverage good - I mean Americans taking over Baghdad."
"I guess."