Trust!

Trust, is either there, or not there. There is never an element of confusion in trust. If there is, that is not trust. Giving in to complete trust is one of the most difficult things in life. However, it is very easy to be broken. It takes ages to built trust in someone or make someone confide their trust in you. However, it takes a split second for it to be broken forever.
Trust, once lost, can never be regained at the same level, unless ofcourse, the same level of effort is put in all over again, and this time, without the time lines. Contrary to this, sometimes, you want to trust the same person, over and over again. Despite all the bad days, despite all the betrayals, you somehow want to confide in that person forever. It, besides our own simplicity, is a direct influence of the confidence you have in that person. There is an element of belief that one day that person would do as you have perceived. It is like as if you have already seen the actions that person would do one day. That is trust.
Perhaps, the only way to continue the trust forever is by being on the same page with that person, by being on the same note as the other is. Not easy, however. For it to happen, one needs to be communicative and understanding enough to carefully observe and rightly conclude whatever that person has to say or whatever that person does. Close relationships have this element.
Trust, has more to do with beliefs rather than what actually happens. People spend a fortune by living a whole life in the belief that a certain thing would come true one day. A particular incident doesn't shatter that. It takes a series of multi-faced incidents that completely breaks the trust eventually.
However, trust is often a natural thing. One never reasons out why they trust a certain person. They never try to question why they have so much trust in a person. To them, it just comes naturally to them and all they know is that it is there. There is something that makes them believe in them, over and above what other people think of them, or how contrary their actions are compared to other people.
But, yes, there is usually atleast one thing that triggers this blind trust and as long as that one quality would be visible, so would the trust be. The minute that thing becomes out of sight, or there comes the feeling that it is not there, trust flies out of the window, without permission.
Trust has a close association with one's beliefs and faith. It is connected with association and time. For many, sticking together under one roof is more important than the situation itself. The importance, here, is given more to the fact that we were together. Therefore, we shall so be. Perhaps, forever.
And for some, sharing only in the good times seems like a wise option. It is their way of living a concern, in making sure that they do not bother the other with their miseries. They hide, keep it to themselves, and face it alone. That way, they think that they are keeping their loved one happy in all respects. They would go to any extent in making sure that they are there for them in their lows, but would never allow theirs' to be shared. What the footnotes of life have proven is otherwise.
Relationship grows stronger where highs and lows are shared by both sides as they come. Whatever, life brings, it is shared. And it is shared as it is. There is always one person in our lives with whom we do actually share everything and we keep it that way forever. That is real friendship. Anyone, with whom one shares partially, is not true friendship and the element of trust would always be weak in those relationships.
There is no single person, who would not bring it all out and keep it to themselves. We are not built that way. Humans are always in a constant search for someone to talk to. We cannot live alone, not atleast forever. And that is where the first element of trust, association, comes. The closer the association is, the deeper the element of trust would be. As the association grows, trust rises with it. For the association to be deeper, time is required. That is the second element of trust.
As important is trust itself, so is keeping it. And that is the most tricky part. For some, it is not very difficult to keep it because they do not expect too much from anyone. They have simpler beliefs, simpler hopes and simpler expectations. They would confide their trust in you for the most minor and easy things in life. On the contrary, others, expect the greatest things from you. Their expectation in you is wider because they have already seen you doing minor things for almost everyone, or atleast, a few other people.
All of us have come across people who pretend otherwise from how things actually are. They lie for as long as they can and they keep it that way for as long as they want to. Life can be much simpler if what you say is what you could mean as well. They like to keep people in an illusionary pattern. Usually this pattern is formed out of their own will and keeping the other person under that fake trust fulfills some of their own purposes. This world is filled with plenty of them.
And then there are some who claim much more and later, simply change all that they said, well, often by avoiding mentioning it. We all know where we do wrong and where we have changed back from our own words. It is not that difficult to realise. And some realise completely, but never admit. And some realise it when they are made to.
Living as one who is trustworthy is quite different from being trustworthy. Some say, only, and some do what they say, always. What is the point of keeping someone under an illusion of trust when eventually everything falls under the blanket of 'saying it for the sake of it' and 'doing it for the sake of it'.
Life is very short. Unless we learn to be true to others, we can never discover our real self. And that takes a lifetime. Why be ashamed of something that you actually are and if others really want to be with you, they would do so even if they know the real you. Most of the disassociation starts not with what you have actually done, but where you failed to depict exactly what happened, or where you said something different from what you actually should have.
Misunderstandings do not rear up from being truthful about your bads, but from evidently creating a wrong out of a right and a right out of a wrong. To some people it matters a lot as to what you said, be it ages back, and what you eventually did. That is, because some people always remember what you said and they believed you on that, they started respecting you for that, and they adored you for what you said you are.
Actions must always be in line with words and words must always be in line with intentions. Complications, created out of a mismatch of such, cannot be healed that easily, ever. Reassurance can only come by change, then. You have to change to be able to fulfil what you said previously. But it must be remembered, that in the meanwhile, you did something completely different, which may mean that you have the potential to revert to multiple changes just to prove something temporarily. An overall change, from within, becomes the only solution. But it is not a cup of tea for everyone, nor can it be pretended. It will always be felt, and the first person who will feel the change is you, if ofcourse, it is there. As said earlier, we all know what we are doing, if not know why.
Irrespective of the scenario and types of people, mentality has the most part to play, where you are constantly reminded to trust in someone. It can be both good and bad. If you perceive the person well, you believe in them well. Trust is as important, as breathing. And so is the fact to constantly communicate to the other, how much you trust in them. This may not be done so only through words and nicely made sentences. It should more be done by way of choices opted and decisions made in our own lives, based on what they want and said. I may not be there for you, but my belief will be, and that is what assures me that you will always be there with me, for me. Anonymous.