“So is there anything, anything at all that we, the public, can look forward to, and let me educate you as to what I mean by looking forward to something — it’s always, not almost always, but always something positive so don’t tell me that inflation is going to go up further. I am in no mood for sarcasm.”
“OK, so let’s start with the recent past – thank the Good Lord that the 2021 recently concluded Asma Jehangir conference invited Nawaz Sharif and not his daughter, I mean the virulence index was less than 65 percent…”
“But the refrain of Father and Daughter is the same: innocent even after a conviction, kicking us out of the PM House was the height of unconstitutional interference by institutions and…and let me finish The Khan is selected and the Selectors…”
“That last bit is courtesy Bilawal Bhutto Zardari.”
“Don’t forget the Bhutto Zardaris have a lot of baggage from their daddy…”
“None whatsoever my friend — and the proof of the pudding is in the fact that Zardari sahib’s elder daughter named her first born after her paternal and not maternal grandfather so there!”
“That’s true anyway I asked for some news that the public can look forward to.”
“Well, there is the IMF — the tranche will be released…”
“But that would be accompanied by a raise in what the State Bank refers to as administered prices – or in other words a rise in electricity and gas prices, a rise in telephone rates, a rise in petrol prices, a rise in…”
“Oh you need to get your facts straight — going on the IMF is the Khan administration’s good economic sense, raising the rates is the fault of previous administrations.”
“An interesting narrative after three and a quarter years in power?”
“There is the ehsaas programme.”
“Two things — one, 85 to 90 percent is a continuation of the Benazir Income Support Programme and two given the rate of inflation there is just not enough monthly disbursement to feed a family of four at today’s prices.”
“That is due to lack of fiscal space which incidentally is the fault of previous administrations.”
“But the ration cards and the money they are disbursing under these schemes is not enough…”
“Read my lips: all the fault of previous corrupt and…”
“Got it.”
“Meanwhile all encroached state land will be vacated as mapping is complete.”
“What about the pledge to bring back money sent abroad by our politicians?”
“Shahzad Akbar has told you once he has told you a thousand times he has written three letters to UK authorities…”
“I give up.”
Copyright Business Recorder, 2021
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