Partly Facetious: How to use toilets?

"Toilets are very important, and they must be clean."
"Agreed, but you know Pakistanis do not really know how to use toilets. Public toilets are simply unusable five minutes after they are cleaned. When travelling PIA one needs to use a toilet within the first ten minutes or so of the commencement of the flight because after that it is wet and dirty and..."
"I suggest we request multilaterals to give us a capacity-building technical assistance to teach the public on how to use a toilet."
"Don't be facetious - anyway more than 50 percent of the people in this country go to the fields and seek walls to relieve themselves."
"OK, so that proves my point - capacity-building TA..."
"The multilaterals give TAs for a sewerage system not on how to use a toilet."
"If we don't know how to use a toilet then what's the point of supporting a sewerage system?"
"We need capacity-building of multilaterals. I hear India is no different."
"What about the Americans? Can't they help us?"
"I think you are referring to our most important road, the avenue where all our major federal buildings are situated, currently in use as a toilet by the dharna attendees".
"Well, actually I was referring to the Capital Development Authority Chairman's statement while chairing a meeting that the public toilet facility in the capital would be improved."
"Ah, so the problem has been identified."
"We are a nation that is very good at identifying a problem and making the appropriate recommendations and legislating, where appropriate. The problem lies in implementation."
"Oh dear! So how many toilets must be constructed on our constitution avenue or near D Chowk?"
"Well, a dharna of say 2000 people - and I am referring to those who spend the night there - around a 1000."
"You are being facetious!"
"OK, 500?"
"Hush - this is not being negotiated."