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Print Print 2015-12-18

Partly Facetious: What is not likely to happen here?

"I saw the Spanish Prime Minister being slapped by a 17-year-old and..."
Published December 18, 2015

"I saw the Spanish Prime Minister being slapped by a 17-year-old and..."
"That's not likely to happen in this country."
"Why ever not? The Prime Minister remains divorced..."
"God forbid... He is not the Khan and Kulsoom is most certainly not..."
"You are being facetious aren't you?"
"No, see the leadership of status quo parties engages in second or third marriages, sometimes concurrently, while this party of change believes in one wife at a time so a divorce is necessary prior to seeking another wife."
"Hmm, see that's what I like about Ishaq Dar."
"Dar sahib has just one wife - I believe she is not resident in Islamabad and..."
"That's not what I was referring to. However many divorces or however many wives at the same time our leaders may sport that does not concern me and..."
"Sport, you reckon it's a sport!"
"Don't you get sanctimonious about it! You did look at all reports with respect to the end of the 10 month marriage of the Khan and you have to admit that we all love gossip and what better gossip than a divorce of a party chairman but when I referred to what I liked about Dar sahib and divorce I was not referring to a literal divorce but a metaphoric one - the guy is so divorced from reality with all his data manipulation and I am afraid the Humpty Dumpty has fallen from the wall and nobody, not even the king's men, can put it together again..."
"You always say that..."
"What?"
"That the finance minister of the day is so bad that no one can beat him and yet the next one is even worse."
"That's true anyway what I meant earlier was that Nawaz Sharif is not likely to be slapped by a bystander because of the heavy security around him and he is divorced from reality because his finance minister continues to hoodwink him by insisting on the veracity of his flawed data..."
"You gotta believe someone no!"
"Right, I for one, believe in a very dark shade of grey, if you know what I mean...."
"No and don't bother explaining, I have become colour blind in this country."

Copyright Business Recorder, 2015

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