Partly Facetious: The glass is half full

"Pakistan's first-ever multidimensional poverty index (MPI) has revealed that poverty in rural areas is 54.6 percent."
"It's all due to the flawed policies of the PPP led coalition government and before that the Musharraf led government and..."
"Hey, silly, the claim is that poverty dropped from 54 percent in 2004 to 39.5 percent in 2016."
"Oh yes, the drop can be attributed to the last three years policies formulated and implemented by focused efforts of the PML-N government and..."
"Oh, can it! Anyway the Professor says that his Vision 2015 envisages a massive reduction in MPI."
"Ah, the Right Honourable N Professor whose visions are anything but psychic and need I add provide a feeble justification for failure to achieve targets during the 5 year tenure that the party gets from the public."
"N Professor?"
"Look at you, focusing on the irrelevant."
"His name is Ahsan Iqbal and you can't take the n, the last letter in his first name, and refer to him as N Professor, it's simply not done."
"Well, you remember the movie about the Nutty Professor - I mean his long-term visions are always well beyond two 5-year terms, and need I add not even most military dictators have ruled that long in this country, and that my friend justifies my placing the N before the Professor."
"Oh dear, anyway apart from reducing the MPI by 2025 is there any other solution on record?"
"As it so happens there is, why don't you tell these poor people to eat chickens, or such is the advice of Ishaq Dar."
"Hey, back off will you, the guy has recently lost his 50,000 rupee watch and he maintains that if Dasti can get more than that for the watch then he should sell it and give the money to charity and..."
"See that's what I like about Dar, he is so very down to earth - had it been Mian sahib or Zardari sahib they would have thought that the value would rise as the item (watch) was in use by them while Dar realistically reckons that no one will pay a higher price for it being in his use."
"Agreed, but the problem is his refusal to accept his limitations - limitations in terms of education and limitations in terms of his time and limitations in terms..."
"The glass is half full my friend, the other half is air in any case."
"Hmmm."